05 December 2008

From the Greek: oinos = wine onios =for sale mania =insanity

While this disorder has not yet been recognized by the Deutsche Gesellschaft Zwangserkrankungen (German organization for obsessive-compulsive disorders) or the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, largely because I've just made up the term, I feel like, perhaps, I may suffer from it.

Spending beyond my budget. Buying wine to make myself feel better. Sometimes, maybe, being less than honest about what I've paid for a bottle.

As an oinosoniomanic -that is, one who suffers from oinosoniomaniacal urges- I feel entitled to some grant money to explore this new and tragic disorder.

So maybe Dr Ellen Stover, director of the Division of Mental Disorders, Behavioral Research, and AIDS at the National Institute of Health can get me involved in a Program 93.242 Mental Health Research Grant to see how I'd respond to buying and enjoying a vertical of Chateau Latour.

Or maybe I can take advantage of the Deep Sequencing and Haplotype Profiling of Mental Disorders Grant to forward our understanding of genomic function vis-a-vis mental disorders by disaggregrating my oinosoniomania into components of finite risks through giving me the money to complete my 1855 Bordeaux Classification tasting project.

You know; for science.

this is from some website on clay drilling. I just thought it'd be a funny representation of science. I imagine Dr Stover is a little older


tbond said...

I don't know if you are familiar with Mike Steingberger at Slate.com, but your disorder is a shared one. I think this article describes one aspect of the compulsion. http://www.slate.com/id/2158319/

Baan Sawan said...

Ha! Thanks for sending this. One of the reasons I started putting more interest in white Burgundies was having read this article when it came out. It was nice to revisit it.
I'd forgotten all about the part where he said: "I immediately called the restaurant and popped the question: Did they, by chance, have the '96 Corton-Charlemagne? "Oui," the owner swiftly replied. And the price? It was 550 euros per bottle, or about $700—eminently doable. He agreed to put one aside, and I agreed to get to Paris as fast as I could."